Madonna's pantsMadonna's pantsWe knew she was getting on a bit, but now we have evidence that Madonna's a chin hair's breadth from joining the biddy brigade.

Exhibit A is her pair of what can only be described as granny pants, lacy though they are. And even scarier is the fact that they sold for a whopping £1,000.

The black tent-with-holes is being sold to a potty Madge fan in Connecticut who saw them on eBay.

For reasons best known to themselves, the fan made a private offer to the current possessor, a lapdance club owner.

Clearly not worried that it would scare his business away, Tony Cochrane pinned the pair up on the wall of his club in Aberdeen.

G UK Sin City Premiere Madonna may 05MadonnaHe'd bought the panties from a costume shop after they were used on the film Bridget Jo... I mean, Body Of Evidence.

Madge starred in the flop flick in 1993.

But after a refit, he decided to cash in on her smalls.

"It was always our intention to sell them to a true fan and we are happy with the sale," the lapdance owner chirped.

Right, auntie Norma's Bhs classics - going once, going twice...